Friday, December 30, 2011

What the Heck is a Petrie Dish?

Petrie (pee tree) Dish (dish, dummy)

This is a small glass dish that gets filled with some kind of gooey jelly stuff, then put in a warm place where a "culture" is grown. Most commonly used to grow the creatures who sit in boardrooms and say...

"Well, what we're doing here is not actually illegal."

Duckie

Tuesday, November 8, 2011

Why Do They Say Power is an Aphrodisiac?

BGD "Fluffy"
Thanks for the question, anonymous reader. Here is a direct quote from a nearly reliable source* in the banking lobby:
"Power is an Aphrodisiac is a polite-company way of saying if a politician or banker can't get any action from anybody but a bimbo gold digger, he might as well screw the public."

*source iaap.tbws+

Photo: © Eric Simard: BigstockPhoto.com

+iaap.tbws (It's All About Power) is a fictitious website. Unlike the other fictitious websites in our family, iaap.tbws does not exist. (at least as of the time of this writing.)

Wednesday, November 2, 2011

What is the Difference Between a Dead Duck and A Dead Duckie

A dead duck is a stinky animal. A dead Duckie would ruin my day.
*ok, so there aren't really any zombie ducks in this article, I just got carried away with Halloween just being over.

Friday, July 8, 2011

Digress

v. 1) skirt the issue, 2) lose track of the issue because of someone's short skirt, 3) make shit up because you can't remember the lie you told last time

e.g. "I couldn't follow what that sumbitch was sayin' because he digressed so much from what the hell he was supposed to be talkin' about."


[ed: kind of like a derivative, but not exactly, ok maybe not even close, but it does begin with the same letter]